


I did a terrible job with it and it looks nothing like you

by mycollection320



Series: Edelgard von Hresvelg's Day Off [2]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Byleth and Dorothea do great El/Edie impressions, Comedy, Crimson Flower, Dorothea and Byleth giggle like schoolgirls over El's cuteness, El is cute, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Hope you have dental insurance to cover the developing cavities, Humor, Made for true Edelgard Dorothea Edeleth Edelethea and Edelthea fans, No plot just happy, OT3, Polyamory, Romance, Wife Squad, edelethea
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-06
Updated: 2020-09-06
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:08:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26321659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mycollection320/pseuds/mycollection320
Summary: Edelgard tries to paint Byleth and Dorothea. Byleth and Dorothea can't stop giggling.
Relationships: Dorothea Arnault & Edelgard von Hresvelg, Dorothea Arnault & My Unit | Byleth, Dorothea Arnault/Edelgard von Hresvelg, Dorothea Arnault/Edelgard von Hresvelg/My Unit | Byleth, Edelgard von Hresvelg & My Unit | Byleth, Edelgard von Hresvelg/My Unit | Byleth
Series: Edelgard von Hresvelg's Day Off [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1912585
Comments: 6
Kudos: 48





	I did a terrible job with it and it looks nothing like you

“Perfect. Try and hold that position, please.” Edelgard closed one eye and lifted the paintbrush with her arm outstretched, flipping the tool from vertical to horizontal and back again in an effort to measure the proportions. She etched a few small lines on the blank canvas propped up before her.

The two bare women laid out gracefully on the royal bed. The smooth curves of Dorothea’s body ran delicately across its surface, effortlessly hugging the fabric below. Byleth’s muscles provided definition to her own curves, casting sculpted shadows under the soft light. The two linked their arms together, bending gently at the elbow.

They sat up slightly on the headboard, leaning their bodies against one another. A bowl of fruits sat between the women. The folds of the tasteful red satin bedsheets enveloped their bodies, and a white silk cloth wrapped around Dorothea’s thigh, weaving across the bed to drape over Byleth’s hips.

It took Edelgard practically an eternity to arrange the scene how she wanted it; that corner of the bedsheet needed to scrunch up to add visual weight… the green apple needed to be in front to echo the green of Dorothea’s eyes… Byleth’s stiff poses needed to be adjusted repeatedly… by the time Edelgard was ready to start, what little focus the two women had left was long gone.

 _“Isn’t Edie’s concentration face just adorable?”_ Dorothea whispered, keeping the volume low enough for only Byleth to hear.

 _“Definitely,”_ Byleth smiled, keeping her voice quiet as well. _“She’s got that tiny wrinkle between her eyebrows again.”_

 _“Ah, so you’ve met Arie too.”_ Byleth made a confused hum, and Dorothea continued, _“the wrinkle, Arie. It’s short for Archbishop Rhea. She always showed up whenever Edie mentioned the archbishop during the war.”_

Byleth managed to stifle her laugh into a chuckle.

 _“I have a lot to catch you up on, By.”_ Dorothea laughed softly. _“Oh, and please don’t tell Edie about Arie. I know she loves us deeply, but her disappointment face is scarier than any enemy I’ve had to face for her in the war,”_ she pouted slightly.

 _“Wouldn’t dream of it,”_ Byleth gently nodded.

Edelgard let out a disgruntled noise in response to the women’s movements, but didn’t follow it up with words. Using the guidelines she made on the canvas, she began to make outlines of the objects and women on the bed.

A silence fell over the room, before the mischievous brown-haired woman cut it short again.

 _“Edie hasn’t looked this way in a while… think I can sneak in a bite of that apple?”_ Dorothea chimed a quiet chuckle, and gestured her chin at the red fruit in the bowl sat between them.

 _“Let’s see you try,”_ Byleth whispered back with a teasing tone, setting up the challenge.

 _“I’ve gotten quite good at swiping things from my bad street girl days, you know,”_ Dorothea teased back _. “They called me Cherry Tongue because I could make things disappear in a red flash, like the swipe of a frog tongue.”_ She paused, _“well…also for some other reasons,”_ Dorothea smirked mischievously. _“Anyway, my city-renowned swiping skills was definitely one of them.”_

“ _Well, enough talk then. Let’s see you in action, Cherry Tongue.”_ Byleth gestured her chin as well toward the fruit bowl with a smirk. “ _If you can take a bite of that apple without El noticing, I’ll take your place and accompany her for the next month of nobles’ dinners.”_

“ _Nice try, By, but you and I both know that’s not really a punishment,”_ Dorothea winked _. “Edie is adorable when she’s in diplomatic emperor mode; I wouldn’t miss a moment of it. Plus, you know how much I love messing with those oblivious nobles… not to mention the food.”_

Byleth chuckled softly, _“Any other ideas, then?”_

 _“War council meetings?”_ Inquired the brown-haired woman. Now that the war ended, the weekly council meetings mainly consisted of hours upon hours of foreign policy, as each region leader rattled on and on. _“Loser takes the winner’s place in the meetings for a month. They’ll have to take notes, too.”_ She smiled.

“ _Deal,”_ Byleth said confidently, _“show me what you’ve got.”_

Dorothea cleared her throat softly, looking carefully between the apple and Edelgard, who was intently focused on filling in the outlined shapes with various paints. The brown-haired woman crept the hand hidden from Edelgard’s view closer toward the apple, maintaining a faint smile when the painter looked twice her way. Then, she snatched the apple with a red flash, grasping it firmly with her hand. The next time Edelgard looked her way, nothing appeared amiss.

Byleth hummed a curious note in approval.

Dorothea waited patiently for the perfect opportunity to make her next move, and it came. Edelgard was layering colors on the solid shapes, eyes intently focused on the canvas, working and reworking the scene. Dorothea brought the fruit to her mouth in a flash and opened wide to take a bite, when suddenly- the fruits in the bowl toppled and rolled loudly, filling in the gap that the stolen apple left.

“Dorothea,” came the emperor’s voice. “Put that down. Those weren’t meant for eating.”

It was too late. Dorothea’s jaw locked tightly onto the red object, “ _Ouuu!_ ” she dropped the solid apple onto the mattress.

“Soft wood.” Edelgard offered with a frown, “covered with red dye. Real fruits don’t keep well for use in paintings.”

Dorothea nodded with a pout as she brought a hand to her aching jaw. Edelgard met her gaze, and laughed softly. “Dorothea love, would it be too much to ask for you to keep out of trouble for a few moments?”

“You got me there, Edie.” Dorothea chuckled. Byleth nodded.

“I still have to finish filling in the paints and add shadows.” Edelgard raised her eyebrow, “do you think you two can resist the temptation to bite into wood for a while longer?”

“Yes, Lady Edelgard ,” Dorothea teased with a low voice and brought a hand to her stomach to imitate a bow.

“Of course, your majesty,” Byleth added with a grin.

Edelgard smiled as well, cocking an eyebrow, “don’t make me get out the handcuffs.”

The consorts nodded with a laugh. A warm silence fell over the room as the women held their poses.

Dorothea bit back the urge to cause further disruption… metaphorically, since her jaw still ached slightly from the wooden apple. After a few more moments, Byleth was the one who broke the silence.

 _“Dorothea, my apologies._ ” Byleth whispered with slight concern, _“is it hurting still?”_

Dorothea shook her head slightly and grinned, keeping her voice low, _“you got me, By, that was hilarious. Looks like I’ll have to fill in your shoes for the next four meetings._ ” She paused, _“think General Eisner can lend me some more war medals so I can look the part?”_

Byleth returned her smile, and shook her head. _“Doesn’t count. Fake apple,”_ she raised an eyebrow. _“Plus, I kind of enjoy the long war council meetings, in a sadistic way. They keep me ready for combat.”_

 _“You sure you don’t want to claim your victory? That’s about twenty hours of noble blabbering you’d save yourself from.”_ Dorothea winked and waited for a response, but Byleth only beamed a warm smile. _“…alright,”_ she returned the smile.

Silence again blanketed the room, and for a while, the only sounds that can be heard were Edelgard’s soft brushes again the cloth canvas and the wet mixing of paint. She was now mixing colors to add shadows to the painting.

“ _Dorothea,_ ” Byleth whispered some time later. “ _Look,”_ With a few soft chuckles, she gestured her chin toward El.

Edelgard was furrowing her eyebrows in concentration, with Arie sitting comfortably on her face. One corner of her mouth was slightly raised as she fixated her eyes on the painting. The back tip of her brush was pressed against her chin, and a big dab of red paint sat on the skin underneath the brush tip, clinging onto her otherwise immaculate complexion.

Dorothea giggled, “ _looks like Edie’s got a battle wound from painting,”_ Edelgard looked adorable, and the brown-haired woman continued giggling. _“Perhaps some faith magic would help?”_

Byleth chucked harder in response, “ _let’s not tell our emperor just yet.”_

With the red paint still on her face, Edelgard looked at the two women and slightly narrowed her eyes to scold them with a stern gaze, before fixating her eyes back onto the painting… it didn’t work at all, and in fact made the two laugh harder.

“It kind of looks like a map of Fodlan,” Dorothea let out louder laughs between her boisterous giggles.

“It does!” Byleth was tearing up at this point, and she couldn’t stop laughing. “Fitting for the royal emperor.”

The two shaking women completely lost it now. They laughed harder and harder. Byleth snorted loudly, and they laughed at each other’s laughs.

“Maybe… it should go…. on our war banner?” Dorothea spoke between her laughs, knocking over the bowl of fake fruit.

“It’s… the right color too,” Byleth snorted loudly again as she tipped her body into Dorothea, and the laughter grew even louder.

“Dorothea. Byleth.” Edelgard brought two fingers to her eyebrows and pinched Arie between them. When she brought them back down, the fingers left two green paint marks on her eyebrows. “What’s the matter?”

The two were having trouble breathing now; they heaved for air between laughs, hunching over one another. Even if they wanted to reply, it was impossible to speak.

Edelgard waited for a few minutes for the roaring laughter to die down, and her stern face melted slowly into a smile. Their giggles and laughs were adorable. Plus, she could never _really_ get mad at either women.

When the two recovered their breathing somewhat, she began again, “I’ll be back in a bit. I need to fetch water and a new cloth. Anything you two beautiful women would like?” Edelgard smiled with a raised eyebrow.

“I’m good, Edie, thanks.” Dorothea said through her soft chuckles, and Byleth nodded.

Edelgard walked over to the two and kissed both women gently on the forehead before she left the room, taking care to close the door tightly and gently behind her.

A moment of silence passed, before a glint flashed again in Dorothea’s eyes. She turned toward Byleth, cleared her throat and struck a pose with her hand on her hip, deepening her voice, “ _My name is Edelgard von_ _Hresvelg, and I will cut a path to Fodlan’s new dawn.”_ She kept her voice even and her face stern, furrowing her eyebrows intently. “ _Did you receive your invitation in the mail to join me on my glorious path? ….yes, the one that read I may have to kill you if you choose not to. Oh, no? Apologies, let me know if you still haven’t received it in the next two weekdays.”_

Byleth laughed aloud.

The blue-haired woman straightened up and put on a serious expression, reaching out with a fist and deepening her voice, " _Hubert, please fetch Amyr and do my hair immediately. I must ride into battle.”_ Byleth turned her back toward the other woman, bringing the back of her head in front of Dorothea, and gestured toward her hair. “ _I said_ _Immediately, Hubert,_ ” Byleth sternly emphasized.

Dorothea let out a fit of giggles once more.

The brown-haired woman opened her eyes wider, and began with a frantic tone, “ _Oh! Professor! Please don’t look this way at the giant wall mural I painted of you! …I… I… paint one of allofmyfriends.”_

Byleth yelped out laugh.

It was her turn again. Byleth lowered her voice down and brought her eyebrows together, speaking evenly. _“Dorothea, I greatly appreciate your supreme talents and military accomplishments during the five years of war. I wanted to ask if you had perhaps priorly previously considered and contemplated by chance of the circumstances and possibility that you… longed to spend the rest of our lives together.”_ Byleth averted her eyes at the last few words and pouted slightly to one side, even managing to conjure up a blush.

Dorothea laughed loudly, “honestly, that wasn’t too different from Edie’s actual proposal.” She shook her head slowly with a smile.

Byleth chuckled softly, and flashed her a sweet smile in return.

Dorothea was next again. She cleared her throat, and walked to the table to grab a few small pieces of paper from the drawer. She sat back on the bed and fanned the papers out in her hands, gaze focusing on the cards, _“I will prevail, my teacher.”_ She looked at Byleth intently, “ _do you have any sevens, my teacher?”_ She paused briefly, furrowing her brows as if to study the cards. _“Go fish, my teacher.”_

Byleth let out a wave of laughter for what felt like the hundredth time.

The two bounced around a few more impressions between them. When Edelgard returned with three hot teas at the door, she heard the still-giggling women from the other side. She let out a chuckle of her own and accepted that the painting session will have to continue another day, before pushing the door open slowly with a smile.

The three spots of paint still clung onto her face, which sparked another lengthy round of giggles. After the laughter settled, the two finally decided to let her know about the paint, and it was finally Edelgard’s turn to let out an endless fit of laughter when she saw her reflection in the mirror.

“Dorothea. Byleth.” She placed the three teas on the table with a wide grin. The cups were now half empty from Edelgard’s shaking laughter. The two women shuffled closer toward her. “You two were certainly having your fun,” Edelgard let out a few residual chuckles.

“Certainly.” Dorothea confirmed with a warm smile, and Byleth hummed a note in agreement through her smirk.

“I love you, El.”

“I love you, Edie.”

The two mischievous women tugged her in tightly into their loving embrace.

**Author's Note:**

> Special thanks to jess_writes and GirthJohnson for the bit with El playing cards saying "my teacher" 1000 times
> 
> Currently working on another edelethea fluff scene that's coming up! Comments are greatly appreciated as always, thank you xx
> 
> twitter: mycollection320


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